we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
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