You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
