I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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