batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
