I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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