On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
