More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
he shaved USA in his pubs
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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