im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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