i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
