i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
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