Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just want nice things and good sex
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
