I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
