Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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