I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
