I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
