I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
