She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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