HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
