problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
