You work out of a Hotel?
Nicole vs. Life
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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