Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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