i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
