just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
