good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
