i just snorted my name. best moment ever
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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