I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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