Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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