All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Randomize
