if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Terrible idea I love it
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
