next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
