just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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