when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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