Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
