I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Life is so much better after having sex.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
