I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
