My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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