I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
