Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize