you mean i was at the winter classic?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize