I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
