you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
