Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
This house was built for laser tag.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
