I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
