I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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