I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
