Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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