i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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