Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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