Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
