none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
